It is also a very difficult thing to be with someone who you don't trust. This is why we must be very careful in the things we do within our relationships. There is no point in telling lies which are going to have a dramatic affect on your relationship. For example, you decide to go behind your partners back and have a date with someone else. Now you are innocent in the sense that you have no intentions of being physically unfaithful. Although you have not been unfaithful you have lied to your partner about who you are going out with. There must have been some reason for you to lie. Maybe its an ex partner or someone your partner doesn't like. Whatever the reason for your lie, you lied. This is a risk that you take, as you may want that freedom for a while to go on this totally innocent date with a friend.
Further down the line your partner finds out about your date, he gets upset about it and you both start arguing. This is where the trust starts to fade a bit. You see we chip away at our own relationships then wonder why or what is going on? Our partner no longer trusts us, he starts to asks all kinds of questions when you are going out. That also creates more problems more arguments.
Relationships are not easy at all. Long term ones are the hardest, as you have had to go along way to get to where you are. The trust issue is very very important. With out trust you have a weak relationship and not a lot of physical or mental freedom.
My solution to this, is to be as honest as possible. I would go out with someone my husband didn't want me to go out with If I really wanted to. I would sit him down and explain why and who. I don't believe we should be controlled in any relationship. We should be able to be as free as is necessary. Yes if you know you are being unfaithful then its wrong to argue with your partner about going out with "friends". His reaction would let me know if it is really worth the risk in the relationship. Its better to be honest. I know at times its not easy, I'm no saint. We all tell the little white lies every so often ie: "Nice shoes, how much were they?" "Darling these are old, Ive had them for ages, just not worn them for a while."
Trust and honesty very important, but not easy.
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