Women Relationship Dating

NO marriage low self esteem

2010-06-16T10:41:00.000+01:00

If he tells you that he does not love you and he will never marry you, what would you do? Surprisingly there are many women out there right now in this very situation. The man that they have fallen in love with and have spent so many years of their life with, has told them that, he does not want to marry them. He has even told them that he does plan on marrying in the future, just not to her!

You would think that was a good enough reason for any woman to run out of there and find a new life. Unfortunately, most women in this situation don't get out fast enough. Their self esteem and self confidence are so low at this stage that they feel its best for them to stay where they are. They are probably scared of being alone or starting all over again. Well I say what is the use in staying in something where there is no love at all. You are giving out all this love and for what?

Self esteem and self confidence can come back. It just needs to be worked upon. Staying in a relationship where there is no love is not a way to get your self esteem back as most of us know. For those of you who don't know, self esteem is just a feeling, self confidence is just a feeling. These are feelings we can nurture and grow again. Just the same as it was knocked it can be mended. It takes time.

You have to start believing in yourself again. You have to look at who you are and what you are about. Forget about the situation you are in for one minute and take some time out for yourself and re discover who you are.

See your self in the future of who you want to be, how you want to feel, what you want to be doing with yourself, the type of man you want. Keep all those things in mind in a positive way. Keep focusing on the new you and watch it develop.

Do whatever it takes for you to get a new life and your confidence back!

Hormonial with pregnancy

2010-06-09T18:30:00.001+01:00

Being pregnant is usually a great feeling. Both you and your partner are excited about the new life you are about to bring into the world. As a woman at times you can tend to feel unloved during your pregnancy or too fat, lazy, tired, miserable. All those unwanted feelings on top of being pregnant, can sometimes show up parts of you that even you didn't knew existed.

So from one day to the next you feel sad and even angry. Your not even sure why you feel like this. The hormones which are produced in your body are there for several reasons during your pregnancy.

Progesterone - This hormone are for relaxing the muscles in your womb which prevent contractions which could lead to miscarriage.

Oestrogen - This Hormone is there to help the preparation of your babies milk

Rexalin - This Hormone helps to soften your tissues and joints helps to increase your flexibility which in turn prepares you for your labour.

These are just a few, these hormones can then lead to you feeling sick which leads to morning sickness. With all these hormones and issues running around your body, no wonder you then scream and shout at him indoors. Half the time he has no idea what is going on. All he knows is that you are pregnant and your hormones are creating havoc on you and him!

There isn't really that much you can do with the sickness the crying the snapping. The most you can do is get yourself into a calmer state as you possibly can for you. Apparently Ginger will help with the morning sickness, try some gentle swimming to keep you calm, this will release the Endorphins which keep us happy.

Let your partner know how all these hormones can affect you, let him know that this is not the usual you and he needs to bare with you and be understanding. You will be back to normal once the baby is born. Just be aware of all of this. Search the Internet for remedies which can reduce some of the feelings.

You want your partner to love your regardless of the hormones, after all your both going through this pregnancy together.

Ask him to give you back massages and foot rubs. Let him bring you breakfast in bed at times. Let him pamper you to keep your moods up there.

How to cope with morning sickness

The power of Love

2010-05-16T20:10:00.001+01:00

Love is a very powerful emotion. The feeling of love can make you do things you never believed you could. Love makes you feel empowered. Not only do you have a constant smile in your heart, you also have a smile coming through your words.

Being in love and being loved is the perfect recipe for a beautiful relationship. Any relationship without love can not and will not last. When the love goes some one must go. You can only cause damage to your own emotions by staying in a loveless relationship.

Once you fall in love and the love comes back, cherish it and nurture it, to keep it alive. Love needs to be cared for and cherished. Love must not be ignored and left to grow on its own. Nothing grows without some kind of nurturing.

If you are in love and you are being loved, allow it to grow into a beautiful flower. Do whatever it takes to allow it to grow.

Love is Beautiful.

Staying Beautiful for you

2010-04-19T15:57:00.000+01:00

We have those days at times when we just feel ugly even though we are not. We also have the days when we feel so beautiful inside and out nothing can spoil our day no matter who comes to try and test us. Being beautiful inside and outside is a must for us women. We know what beauty is, the beauty which relates to us as individuals.

What I think to be beautiful another person may not. Its what we see for ourselves that matters. When we feel beautiful inside and out, so does our relationships. We give out what we feel. If you feel ugly or less attractive for the day, do something about it. We can all make ourselves feel and look beautiful. If you look into the mirror and you dont like what you see change it. Put some make up on and make your face glow. Get a sun tan if you need one. Change your hair style, buy a new outfit. Do something about your beauty. Its there just look in the mirror and see your own beauty.

Its so important for us to feel great about the way we look and feel, our partners will pick up on it and treat us exactly how we feel. So go the extra mile and take care of yourself. Dont let yourself go, just becuase you have put on some weight, it doesnt mean it has to stay there. Get rid of it. Just becuase you have gained a few lines, they dont have to stay there either, depending on how far you want to go, you can also get rid of that too!

If your car broke down would you leave it on the roadside or would you pay the extra few hundred pounds to fix it? Well if you have a few things that need tending to I would say dont leave it by the way side, fix it! Enjoy what you look at in the mirror. Feel good and let others feel what you are feeling too.

How many of you wear your favourite perfume only on special occassions? Listen wear it all the time, life is for living and enjoying, have fun look good and let him get the hots for you everyday, not just once in a while. Make the effort and make it happen.

How to Get Your Man Back (Rubbish)

2010-03-26T17:03:00.000Z

Serioulsy now, why on earth would you want to take back anyone who left you for someone else? Dont you have any self respect for yourself? You are worth so much more than a hand me down. Leave him there with the woman he left your for and watch him come back begging for forgiveness. You dont need to go out and get him. If he left out of cheating and just wanting someting new leave him to get on with it. He will soon come running back if you believe you are worth more.......... Really though, would you take him back?
I dont beleive you should. Anyman who leaves you for another woman is not worth taking back. Imagine he left you feeling unloved, hurt, rejected and with a broken heart, why on earth would you want to take him back. He will only do it again,this time he may not leave, but he will see many other women behind your back. Especially now that you have taken him back. He will see you as an easy target, a pushover. Leave him there, let them have him!

He left you at home wondering where he was, he left you wondering who was calling his phone, who was making him smile........... remember he even made love to her and left you there wanting. He probably spent your money on her taking her on dates, wining and dining her. I say your money because he was your love therefore he spent on her what he should have spent on you. You dont need him back in your life to make you feel like crap again. Your Mr Right is just around the corner waiting for you. If you allow him to come in then he will. If you spend all your time thinking about how to get him back, then you will lose the true one who is waiting for you.

How to keep your relationship

2010-03-25T15:15:00.000Z

Keeping the romance within a relationship is not difficult if it is something you have always done. No one wants a stale relationship. Everyone wants to be in love and feel loved. There are so many things we can do to keep the relationship alive, even when you think it is dying. When you do get to a stage of thinking your relationship is dying why not step back and look at when you first met. Remember how he made you feel, remember how he looked at you? Well why not go back to basics and revive the relationship, do the things you did in the begining, the things which made him fall in love with you and you him.

Wear the clothes you used to wear, well at least the type and the style. If you used to wear sexy fitted dresses and all he sees you in now are baggy tracksuits and the same old jeans, he may have stopped fancying you. You dont want your partner to stop fancying you. Go out of your way and dress up for him. If you have piled on the pounds, think about releasing them. We cant expect our men not to have wandering eyes when we dont look apealing to his eyes anymore.

Do not get complacent in your relationship, dont allow your partner to look at other women and wish you looked that way or acted that way, or was as romantic as that other person seems. The same goes with you too, you could be having roaming eyes because your partner have let himself go. We must make the effort in our relationships and not expect everything to stay the same as it was when we first met, if we have changed a lot!

It all goes with taking care of ourselves as women. We must make the effort for ourselves. Treat yourself to some pampering, go shopping and treat yourself to a new outfit a bag and a pair of shoes. Stop stressing about bills all the time. Make yourself look beautiful and give him a surprise.

should you leave?

2010-03-05T17:47:00.000Z

You stay with him because its what you are used to. You stay with him because you are afraid to move on. You stay with him simply because you are not sure if you are doing the right thing. You stay with him because you are waiting for the right time. You stay with him because you need to get yourself sorted out before you move on, as you don't want too many distractions in your life.

Sometimes we stay with people all for the wrong reasons. Its not for love and it should be, it shouldn't be for all the other reasons, like, he makes life easier for me financially, Im scared to be on my own, my children need him around, I would hate to start a new relationship, better the devil you know. Yes we know about all of those excuses, but do you love him? does he love you?

I don't believe in cheating at all, but lately I have been listening to some women speaking and I can actually see why they would cheat, although I don't believe in it and I would not condone it. The way I see it, if you are with someone for any other reason other than love, then I belive there is room for you to stray. Every woman wants to feel loved and adored. Every woman wants to feel like a little princess. We may not speak about it, but deep down we want to be treated like the little princess in his life. Of course there is a lot more to any relationship than just love. Of course it goes deeper we want our men to be men also. We want our man to be able to fix the tap if its leaking or, carry the heavy shopping in doors for example.

But love is something that we all need to feel and give. If you are not feeling this then you may end up straying. The way I see it is, if you don't feel it, then don't stay in it. What if you stray and your straying becomes a habit, what if you end up having two relationships on the go, then what? When I say don't stray, there is no point you being with someone out of habit. If you meet someone new and you do fall in love, then obviously there is room for you to love someone else, whilst you are already in a relationship. I would say the other relationship is dead.

People can make mistakes, maybe you feel as though you are in love with this new person because he gives you what your partner is not giving you in doors. If this is the case, how will you feel once you stop seeing this new one, will you feel guilty, will you confess all? Further more will your original partner be able to give you what he hasn't been giving you why you have had to stray in the first place?

very very difficult and I don't envy anyone in this position. If your relationship is dead and your man is not what you want. I would say leave rather than staying there and being unhappy enough for you to cheat.

The other man may be the man of your dreams!

Valentines Day

2010-02-14T01:40:00.001Z

Don't stress, yes it's officially the most romantic day of the year. Great so lets all divert our attentions to this day and have romance! Yes have the romance for the day but lets have it everyday, not just on Valentines day. Valentines day can end up like xmas day if your not careful. You can go and overspend. I believe if you are normally romantic with your partner then you don't have to go all out on "Valentines Day".

My husband and I are generally romantic towards each other. Yes we will make sure that we do something different on that day only because it is "Valentines Day". I love romance but I wont be forced into the consumer part of it. My husband and I will do what we want to do. I refuse to spend a romantic night in a hotel for the double the price. We do that anyway for half the cost on a normal night. Like I said I love romance, but when we say not when the world says it has to be.

Our Valentines night will be spent eating a pizza in the car with a small bottle of champagne somewhere usually by a beech or the country, with some nice smooth music. We find this very romantic. So if you don't buy into the whole over spending on Valentines day then do something simple. This is my choice by the way. Personally our anniversaries are more special to me as those are our days and not the worlds.

If you don't have a valentine just plan for one for next year. Think about how you want them to look, act and treat you. Sleep with that on your mind, think about it during the day. Keep doing this for at least 31 days. Eventually they will appear.

Happy Valentine.

x

Dont just give up

2010-02-10T17:40:00.005Z

I thought I would send this quick note letting you know how beautiful you women are. You must believe how great you are and you must not give up on relationships. I am hearing from some of my readers some real
negativity. I am hearing how some of you don't want relationships
anymore. You have given up finding mr right.
We must never give up on ourselves. Yes relationships do turn sour but it does not mean there is no hope for us in the future. just because that
relationship has not worked don't see all relationships as your old one.
Leave the old one there in the past where it belongs.
If you go around believing that all relationships are bad then you will
only get what you believe, and thats a bad relationship. Go into a new
relationship with good positive thoughts and not bad ones. Don't go
rushing into a relationship either soon after you have ended a negative
one. Give yourself time to breath. Time to get over the old one.

If you are already in a relationship and you are having problems, deal with
them. Don't see it as the end of the world. Turn the negativity into
a positive. If you sit down long enough and look into it you will find
some positivity out of it. Go back to the beginning and remember the
good times. Reenact them.

Don't live on negativity

Listen to my audio cd. There are some good tips there, that can help
along the way.

Woman get real with your Man

Woman get real with your Man

2010-01-30T03:27:00.001Z

I have taken my time to record a cd all about our relationships. I have used what I have learned in the past to record this. If you want solutions to why your man is treating you a certain way. Or even why you feel how you do in any relationship. Then treat yourself to my cd. Woman get real with your Man . I am very harsh in the way I put things across. I don't believe in prettying things up. There are too many women out there suffering in their relationships and they don't need to. Find out the solutions to why your relationship is going the way it is.

Find out why your man has stopped taking you out. Find out why he no longer compliments you. Its all there the raw hard facts.

Order the cd, once it comes, brace yourself for a real bumpy ride.

Don't just give up.

2010-01-19T00:37:00.001Z

If you are looking for a new relationship and you feel like giving up. Please do not resort to lowering your standards. Whatever you want in any relationship you can find it and get it. You just got to want it enough and take action for it. There is a Prince Charming out there for all of us, but if we give up looking or waiting and decide to take the next one that walks through the door then you are doomed for a failed relationship.

Have more patience and wait for him, he will come. Its your dream and you must never give up on it. Do not give up on your dreams. If anyone tells you that you are aiming too high take no notice of them. You will get what you ask for and what you dream of, as long as you keep dreaming about him and expecting him to come. I dreamed about the man I wanted until I eventually got him. I had many people telling me my chest was too high, in other words I should not set my sights too high. Well I did set them high, as high as I wanted and then guess what? yes I got him. So do what I did and don't give up. He will come to you. don't give up take action and be who you want to be and attract the man you want. Think about the man last thing at night and first thing in the morning. Think about how you want him to look, speak, walk, dress the lot.

Trust that he will come and he will.

Time Out

2010-01-12T00:37:00.000Z

We must take time out at times. Now not time out of our relationships this time. This time Im talking about time out from the every day hassle and bustle of work, business life. We must take time out for our relationships otherwise it will be doomed for failure. How are you meant to get close with your partner if you are so career minded. Yes its great you want to be independent but what about your relationship?

You go up that ladder girl, but don't forget to keep him in mind. Don't make him feel less of a man because you are talking about your great future prospects, take some time out to spend quality time with him. Don't bore him with the me me me me me conversations. Leave it alone sometimes, he does acknowledge it and he does love you. He just doesn't want to hear it all the time. We as women can forget at times, men are like babies and need just as much attention as we do, positive loving caring attention. Focus on him for a whole week. Go out of your way to do just for him, awaken the love within him for you. Do this just for a week and watch the difference in his love to you.

We women want to be independent and strong but we forget about him along the way. Our men need to feel like men. You can be career minded and independent with him in mind, remember he needs to feel like a man. If you stop making him feel like a man, he will stop making you feel like the princess that you are.

So for this week, pamper your man.

New Relationships

2010-01-04T15:42:00.001Z

I thought I would touch on this subject as new relationships are not always easy. You know that one is for you but its not easy. A friend of mine met a new guy they really like each other and get on really well. She has only known him for a month so not long. They live a few hours away from each other so only get to see each other on the weekends for now. Thats normal nothing wrong with that. When you meet someone new and you just start out in a relationship you wont know much about each other. This is why we ask each other questions to find out more about each other. We want to know something about their past,why they broke up with their ex etc. This way we can put the puzzle of our new partner together.

You have gotten to know each other the best you can in such a short space of time. Naturally the more you are with each other and talk to each other on the phone you will get to know each other more. Meeting the friends the family etc. Don't expect perfection and don't expect that person to drop everything and change all their ways and lifestyle to suit you. This is a mistake people can make too early on in relationships.

My friend heard rumors about this new guy that she had met that he was a player, that he was seeing other women. My friend being the way she was did not like what she heard and made up her mind not to continue seeing this guy. Now I spoke to her and told her that she should not rush out of the relationship so fast. If she has heard that he is seeing other women she has to allow him to get on with his life the way she met him until they get to know each other. No one is going to drop their lives and commit 100% in any relationship immediately (well at least most people don't) . If you think they should do that for you,then you have a long way to go. Im not saying that the guy should continue seeing other women forever or for much longer. Just because we meet someone it doesn't mean that he is the one straight away. We have to wait and give it time to take its course. Maybe he does not want to commit to you and he is just testing the waters, therefore he will stop dating the other women once he is serious about his life or you.

Just because he is a player now, does not mean he will stay a player. He just needs to find the right person to settle down with. I don't believe in cheating or players but what I do believe is that if a man is dating women and he has not committed him self to anyone at that particular moment, then you will have a choice to continue to date this guy or stop. If you meet someone its up to you to ask him if he is seeing anyone, he can then let you know yes or no, serious or not serious, just dating. He could be searching for his Mrs Right. Naturally if he is dating there has to be a limit on how long he is dating other women for!

Xmas Photos

2009-12-29T03:33:00.001Z

As promised here are a few photos of myself and my husband during the eve before the eve and xmas eve. I really do hope you guys stuck to your end of the deal and made your evenings special.

My husband tending to the turkey with his xmas hat on.

My turn with the turkey!

The ones with the negligee on you will just have to believe that we had the egg nog and the mince pies. We had so much fun we laughed ate and drank.

Hope you all had a fab xmas. Ill be back in the new year.

x

Xmas and Romance

2009-12-21T17:39:00.001Z

Xmas is the time of year when we women are rushing around, trying our best to do the best xmas ever. We want the table to be dressed well, we want to make sure the family are well cared for in the presents department. We also want to make sure we get our partner something a bit more special than last year.

Ladies lets not leave out the romance in xmas. With all the rushing around you may forget all the little extra or special things you need to do for him to feel that extra bit more special. We know we do these things more than once a year, more than just at xmas, but at xmas its all about romance as well as the presents. So what are you going to do this year to make him and yourself feel a bit more special. As you know the more you do for him the more you get back in return as he feels loved. Here a few tips of things you can do for him or for you both these things will be within everyones budget I hope. Also if you have never done any of this try and do this, it may sound silly some of it, but you can have fun doing it.

Buy 2 silly xmas aprons, one for you and one for him

The eve before xmas eve, All the shopping should all be done by now and you may be preparing the turkey..... Try preparing the turkey together, whilst your both doing, this play some xmas music whilst drinking some xmas wine. Do a really silly dance just to get him in the mood as he may not want to get involved make him laugh. (Be different)

Xmas Eve

mmmm Mince pie time. In the evening after a nice relaxing bath with all the nice scented oils Serve your husband/partner with his xmas mince pies with loads of cream on it a nice glass of eggnog. Make sure this is a quiet time when kids are away in bed. Again xmas music in the background. Put on your new xmas negligee and feed each other mince pies, try doing this with xmas hats on. (it must be fun as well as romantic) So simple and basic, yet these things can make the world of difference to him. Make him feel special, so he can make you feel special back.

I will be doing these things, I will even take photos of us and stick them on here for all to see, that will be fun!! I would love to see your photos too. Email them to me if you want to see them on here. awalters@awalterskitone.co.uk

You may want to try out a new recipe for the family too.

Thank You

2009-12-21T00:00:00.002Z

Hi Guys, just a quick thank you to all those who have purchased my book today. My book is about my past life, if you have not already purchased it, the link is on the right hand side. Happy reading.

Are you the other Woman?

2009-12-13T18:08:00.001Z

Are you the other woman and if so Why? What makes us women fall for men who are already taken? Do we think that little of ourselves or do we believe him when he says, he is not happy with her at home, and you are the one for him and that he will be leaving the other woman soon? Do you really believe this?

I believe if you are single then you are better off staying single until the right person comes along. We must not sell ourselves short. I understand that you may have met someone then found out that he is with someone else. If you found out a long while after then it may not be so easy to just get up and walk away but you have to find that strength and go. If he has been seeing you both for such a long time, then he really has no intentions of making you his woman. if you found out a few months after getting together then it would be a lot easier to leave this person rather than staying in that dead end relationship. This kind of man is not a faithful man. Especially as he is playing you with his other partner. I believe if a man is already with someone, then meets someone new and falls in love with the new woman, then this man has to be serious with the partner he is originally with. He cant say he has fallen in love with this new woman then have them both. For him to fall in love with you "the other woman", either he no longer loves her indoors or he is lying to you! Just remember he is a liar, after all he is lying to his woman indoors, Im sure he hasn't told her about you.

He has to make a choice, but when women decide to stay with the cheating man hoping and waiting for him to leave the main woman, we just give him his cake to eat. Then we go around complaining that men are cheats and they are useless. Sometimes we make them the way they are. If you accept to stay with that man who has another woman, then it makes you the one in the wrong also. He wont leave her for you, and if he does will you really trust him. He will do the same thing to you, he will cheat on you too and you will have another woman in your relationship in the future.

If he did leave his woman for you, Im not sure how you could sleep at night knowing that you have the man that was with another woman. I know that I would be panicking, "is he seeing someone else" You become insecure, you become paranoid. if you do become the main woman. I don't believe that you will trust him or even could. This is how women get low self esteem. Some of these things we give to ourselves. You then start to believe that you may as well be with him, even if he has got another woman because you wont find anyone anyway. Thats how you build up the low self esteem.

You get to a point where you want someone for yourself, well how are you going to find anyone with someone else's man in your life? You may as well be on your own, being single is not a crime. There are so many good men out there, single good men. This man will keep you there being his other woman for years if you let him. I know of a woman who has been the other woman for 7 years now. Its not fair on the other woman. We as women must take other woman's feeling into consideration. Would you like to have a man, fall in love set up a life with him then to find out that he is seeing someone else. There is such a thing as Karma, and this could happen to you. It is a selfish thing to do.

The man very rarely leaves his woman for the other woman, and if he does I don't believe that relationship will be a strong one.

Now on the other hand if there is another reason for the man to be seeing someone else, ie: he is no longer in love with her indoors, she has been seeing someone else, or any other valid reason, I believe that man still needs to end his relationship with the main woman first before he goes pursuing another woman.

Just don't be that other woman, its not worth it. Most of what he tells you will be lies. There is a link at the end of this for anyone who wants help in finding and keeping the right person.

Find someone for you and make it be the right person.

Long Distance Relationships can they work?

2009-12-01T13:53:00.000Z

I personally believe long distance relationship can work, with a lot of hard work and trust. When I say long distance I am talking about from one country to another. If you know that you are both committed to each other and you are planning for a future together, then you are on the right track. Let me explain a bit more about what I am talking about. If you meet someone and you are having a relationship together wether you meet in the same country or online, where ever. If you both decide that, that is what you both want then it can work. If you are both committed to traveling to see each other in opposite countries and you do it, then it can work. What you will find is that over time one of you will make the right decision as to who is moving where, as one of you have to move somewhere for you both to continue your lives together. Don't think for one moment that one of you wont be moving.

Long distance relationships can work just remember one of you will be moving eventually. If you think you can have this relationship just on cam, over the phone, email, texting etc, then you are wrong. One of you will be moving if you want to be together. If you see that neither one of you are going to make that move, then this is when naturally the relationship is not going to work. Again, this will take time. If it happens within the first year then great, if not don't worry, it doesn't mean it wont happen. Some things take longer with some people, due to commitments. Ie: education, family work. As long as you make it your priority to travel every now and then to see each other.

If you find someone who you get on with and they live hundreds and thousands of miles away from you, there is no harm is starting your life together in another country. Who said the love of your life is in the country you live in? Its a big wide world out there for any successful relationship.

Relationships can work anywhere for anyone, as long as you want it and you work at it. Just remember anything in life worth having does not come easy.

Work on your relationship together.

So Your having a baby

2009-11-30T03:04:00.003Z

Having a baby is a great thing in a relationship. Having a baby is joyous. I would love to talk about having a fantastic experience being pregnant and with the partner, but unfortunately, I have not had that experience as I was a single mother. What I do know is being alone and pregnant is one of the worse feelings ever. Im not going to focus on being alone and pregnant, what I am going to do is talk about how great it is to have someone whilst you are pregnant, and how wonderful it is to have someone feel when your baby is moving around inside of you, going along to those scans and seeing your baby for the first time together. I know how wonderful that must be as I imagined those things for years.

Another thing about being pregnant and having a baby, is all the things you are about to learn about babies, all the new things the old things. Things from what your own parents told you. There are some things we learn by default, some things we don't have any idea about. Being pregnant and having babies is a very emotional thing. We need to have as much support as we possibly can from our loved ones especially. Our hormones will be all over the place we will even get our partner upset with us at times. He will not always be as understanding as you need him to be, as he is not aware of all the changes going on inside.

Going into labour is another experience all together. We go to all the antenatal classes with all the advice on what to do, the next thing you know you are out of control once you do go into labour. when the baby is born, raising the baby into a child and then an adult is another story.

Being pregnant I believe we must enjoy it with our partner, we need to cherish every moment we can. Get all the attention possible and be spoilt by him as much as possible. I was very young when I had my children but I do know how great it feels to be spoilt by anyone, so to be spoilt by your partner/husband whilst you are pregnant would be fantastic.

Enjoy every moment of it. Put your feet up rest, be nice to your partner so he can be as understanding as you need him to be so you can get spoilt more. Let him enjoy those moments with you too. I know it can be hard at times as we feel upset and emotional during our pregnancy at times, but allow him to be as supportive as he wants to be and as supportive as he can be. Let him take over with many things, enjoy your pregnancy you deserve to.

Relationships and Debt

2009-11-29T00:17:00.000Z

This is the time of year when things can get nasty for some relationships. One its xmas season and two this crunch! I would just like to say, if you find yourself getting really irrate with your partner at this time of year, try not to stress too much. You wont be the only one with financial problems.

Relationships shouldn't be spoiled due to the lack of funds. Just dont expect too much from each other at this time of year. if you are flushed with the cash then its great for you, you can enjoy your xmas without the money worries. Women dont get distressed at him if he cant afford to do the things for you that he usually does, or that you expect him to do, especially if you know that money is tight. There are so many things you can buy each other on a budget. As long as all your xmases are not lacking thats the main thing. If all your xmases are lacking then you need to ask yourself a few questions about your relationship. No one should have bad years every year!

If you know that things have been tight for a while then you should not expect an over lavish xmas. Dont stress yourself and your partner out. Just take it easy this time and enjoy each other instead. Have a differant xmas this year. One where you focus on just the two of you. Or should I say where you focus more on the two of you. Plan for next year xmas to be a better one. If you have debt now because of the crunch, the last thing you need to do now, is put yourself in more debt just for a few days event! If you go over the top and top up the debt on those cards, you and your partner will have more to argue about in january when those bills come rolling in.

So if I was you I would enjoy your one another then when xmas is all over you can look back, see how much money you saved and how much fun you both had with each other. no arguing over extra bills either.

If you are having finanacial problems please read this.

Release yourself from debt

After the Storm the Calm

2009-11-27T19:14:00.005Z

Its so great to see when relationships become good, after going through many years or long periods of bad times. I believe you have to want it to work for it to work. Although there are people out there who are in long term relationships and have made it work by going through all the crazy things together, accepting a lot of negative things about one another, or ignoring the negative things about one another. Firstly I will say this does not account for all relationships. I am speaking about a few relationships I have watched over the years.

There is one particular relationship I know of, where both parties were not very nice to each other. It made me wonder why they were still together. I must say now that it is a great thing to see now that after 10 years of being together and most of the relationship being negative, that they have finally worked things out. I will take some of the credit here, with my advice over the years and watching them put my advice into action. They are now very loving towards one another. They holiday together they wine and dine each other, they really do appreciate one another, it is a great thing to see its even better hearing about how they now feel for one another. Their relationship had to do a complete turnaround, they have found the respect they should have had in the beginning, for each other. They love each other and show it.

With the correct advice taking the criticism, learning to accept where you have gone wrong. Learning not to pass the blame, they have had to look deeply within themselves to get to where they are now. So all of you out there who are finding things difficult with your partners, it is possible to change the way things are, especially if you both want to be with one another.

Be patient look into your selves and ask yourselves these questions.

Do you still want to be with your partner?

Do you love him?

Could you fancy him again?

Do you think he loves you?

Amongst other questions. Ask yourself those first, if you can answer yes to just those questions, then there is hope for you. Just hang in there. If you would like like to hear more about this, leave your details to receive more in depth information.

Single Women online Dating

2009-11-26T18:50:00.008Z

I am happily married, but I havnt always been. I have had some awful experiences with relationships in the past, like most people. The only problem is I was one of those women who didnt learn by her mistakes. I kept making the same mistakes over and over again and wondering why I was always a singleton. So believe me I know what its like to be single. The reason Im speaking about this is because, its all been a bit quiet here with me lately as I have been in the process of setting up another blog. This one focuses more on single people.

My blog dedicates its self to Online dating, its a very niche market, but it works. I have created a link for anyone who would like to take a look at that site, for any single friends. I believe the two sites can work hand in hand with one another.

I remember being single, its not always as bad as some people make it out to be. I suppose it depends on what you are looking for. Some people have got to be in a relationship, whilst others are just glad for the attention, without the commitment.

I wont go on about it too much,. Tomorrow I will be focusing on relationships.

Katie price and Peter andre

2009-11-02T00:32:00.008Z

I have been reading so many things about Peter and Katie. Everyday there is something in the papers about them. I think there is so much to learn about their relationship. I believe they went into the public lime light far too early. They didn't give themselves enough time to get to know one another to go out into the public like that. We need to be careful how we expose our new relationships within the public, including friends and family. Lets get to know one another first. The strain can become too much. Look what it did to these two.

What do you think?

Trust

2009-10-26T19:05:00.006Z

Trust is a very big issue in any relationship. It doesn't grow over night. Trust takes a long time to build in any relationship. One thing I have learned over the years is that if you loose trust with someone it will be very hard to gain it back if ever.

It is also a very difficult thing to be with someone who you don't trust. This is why we must be very careful in the things we do within our relationships. There is no point in telling lies which are going to have a dramatic affect on your relationship. For example, you decide to go behind your partners back and have a date with someone else. Now you are innocent in the sense that you have no intentions of being physically unfaithful. Although you have not been unfaithful you have lied to your partner about who you are going out with. There must have been some reason for you to lie. Maybe its an ex partner or someone your partner doesn't like. Whatever the reason for your lie, you lied. This is a risk that you take, as you may want that freedom for a while to go on this totally innocent date with a friend.

Further down the line your partner finds out about your date, he gets upset about it and you both start arguing. This is where the trust starts to fade a bit. You see we chip away at our own relationships then wonder why or what is going on? Our partner no longer trusts us, he starts to asks all kinds of questions when you are going out. That also creates more problems more arguments.

Relationships are not easy at all. Long term ones are the hardest, as you have had to go along way to get to where you are. The trust issue is very very important. With out trust you have a weak relationship and not a lot of physical or mental freedom.

My solution to this, is to be as honest as possible. I would go out with someone my husband didn't want me to go out with If I really wanted to. I would sit him down and explain why and who. I don't believe we should be controlled in any relationship. We should be able to be as free as is necessary. Yes if you know you are being unfaithful then its wrong to argue with your partner about going out with "friends". His reaction would let me know if it is really worth the risk in the relationship. Its better to be honest. I know at times its not easy, I'm no saint. We all tell the little white lies every so often ie: "Nice shoes, how much were they?" "Darling these are old, Ive had them for ages, just not worn them for a while."

Trust and honesty very important, but not easy.

Wedding Anniversary

2009-09-18T16:03:00.006+01:00

I believe that I have a great relationship with my husband. We all go through those moments when we think, man this is hard. I also believe that as long as you don't have those moments too often then you are on the right track. My moment happened a couple of weeks ago. It didn't last long, now I'm on the right track again. I think if we said those moments didn't ever happen, we would be lying.

My husband has whisked me away to a beautiful spa hotel. I'm loving it. Its our wedding anniversary and I wasn't sure what was in store as we were both busy working. Well first off in the office I get a knock on the door. I go to open it and my husband is standing there with a big bunch of flowers. He walks off, comes back to my office 2 hours later and tells me I have to finish now. He said he has closed his office and we need to go. I asked him where we were going he said I would have to wait and see. Well the long and short of it all is, a beautiful spa hotel. I have been in the suana steam room and swimming my happy little heart out. We are staying in a gorgeous manor house. When I get back i will upload some photos for you all to see.

Relationships are fab. I have also just done a ebook on relationships. its called

Good and Bad Relationships. Have a read and let me know what you think.

Communication

2009-09-09T15:01:00.007+01:00

We must communicate with our partners for them to understand us and for us to understand them. If there is something which is playing on your mind and you don't talk to him about it, then believe me it will come out in other ways. Eventually what you are holding in your mind will come out in your actions. If you believe deep down your partner is being unfair to you in any way at all you must let him know.

The thing is, if you believe that he is being unfair and you don't communicate it to him you will become stand offish towards him. You may even start to treat him negatively without him understanding why. You may not even understand why you are treating him the way you are yourself. If you keep things inside, it has a very funny way of showing up in all types of different forms. You may think that you have forgotten about it, but your actions are saying something completely different. Let me give you an example.

Your husband starts to receive phone calls from someone you don't know. He hasn't explained to you who that person is or what that phone call was about. Now his phone call and conversation could be very innocent, but you start to build a picture into your mind of what the conversation could have been about. You now decide not to speak to him about it, but its killing you inside. Now you have built up this un-trusting nature towards him. You decide to meet new people and have your own secret phone calls. You even start going out on dates with other men, as you believe your partner is hiding things from you. This is where all the un-trusting starts. He asks you where you are going, you tell him you are going out with "Pauline" He believes you but you have just told him a lie. Did he really deserve that? Why didn't you communicate with him to find out what that or those calls were about. So now your actions are all to do with getting your own back on him for something he may not have done. Thats just one example there are many more.

We need to communicate all things which bother us, regardless of the outcome. Other wise resentment come out of a once beautiful relationship.

Read more on communicating with him here.

What is Love?

2009-09-01T12:14:00.007+01:00

You and your man are happy. What a great feeling. Your both happy and in love. You still get excited when you see each other, even after so many years. He still makes you go weak at the knees. You both have romantic meals together. You holiday together, you have great conversations. You dance together at home and out. You do so much together. You still buy each other gifts, and leave love notes around the place from time to time.

You wake up in the morning you look at each other and there is love in your eyes and his. You kiss each other goodbye, you kiss each other hello. You think about each other throughout the day. You text each other, you send the odd cheeky email.

You still have your me time.... you still do the things you love to do with your friends or other family members. Your both happy to do that apart from each other. You miss each other when your apart, but its the kind of missing where you are looking forward to going home to him. He is looking forward to seeing you too.

You argue about something you both get upset. Then you make up and talk about it. You cuddle on the sofa have a glass of wine, you relax and unwind. Your both still in love regardless of the argument. These things happen. When you do argue, you make up and the feeling feels as though you have just met again.

You fancy each other like mad. You cant get enough of each other.

Who truly has this?

Why don't you leave???

2009-08-31T19:45:00.008+01:00

When you are deceiving your partner, why do you try and change the script? Why do you make it look like you are innocent and your partner is the one in the wrong?

Let me give you an example:

You are sleeping with/seeing someone else, obviously behind your partners back. Then you do something like, for example, get all dressed up with loads of aftershave on or perfume you get yourself all done up to go out "alone". Your about to step out of the door when your partner has a go at you, an arguement starts. You know you are about to go and do some deceitful. Your partner is not silly, he or she has seen the texts you receive early hours of the morning, you switch your phone off at night! You get those phone calls where your are hardly speaking, just one word answers.

So you got all this going on and now your all dressed up looking good and smelling good. You are on your way out the door and you expect your partner not to say anything to you! What is all that about? Why do people who cheat act like victims at this time? So your partner starts on you, telling you, they know what you are up to. You then play the victim. You call people and tell them how your partner is mad, they are accusing you of all kinds of things. You start to say many negative things about your partner, knowing exactly what you are about to go and do. Your partner is not mad, you are the one who is going out to deceive your partner.

Why do we do this? Do we not know there is such a thing as Karma? If this is what you are doing to another human being don't you think it is best for you to leave and move on? why are you still there?

I believe when it gets to this stage, its time for one of you to move on permanently. The one doing the cheating should leave. Why are you still there? Are things too nice for you at home what is it?

Should we do what we want to do?

2009-08-24T15:01:00.006+01:00

Should we do what we want to do, when our partner doesn't agree with it?

This is a difficult one. For me I believe it depends on the outcome. We need to remember we are all individuals. We must be able to still do things which make us happy regardless of the relationship. If you have decided to do something which your partner does not like, first find out why he doesn't like it. You need to really look at the final outcome. Ask yourself these questions:

Will it benefit me or him?

Will I be happy with the final outcome?

Will it help me to achieve my goal?

How long will he be upset for?

Do you believe he will get over it, then accept it and move on?

Is it the best thing for you?

Will it make you truly happy?

Will it help you to move On?

I believe once you have the answers to those questions, then you should be able to make the right decision. There is no point in upsetting others if what you want to do is only a short term fix, to a long term problem.

A small gift.

2009-08-16T21:03:00.002+01:00

It really is the little things in life that really count. Sometimes its nice to just come home with a small thank you gift for your loved one. The other day I went out for coffee sat down and started taking some notes. I got an instinct to go out an buy something small for my husband. I went to the card shop and bought a blank card. I went back to the coffee shop and wrote a small message in there for my husband. I started to thank him for all the support he gives me throughout our relationship. My husband was so grateful for the £1.99 card. He felt loved and cared for. It reminded him of what we have together and why we are together.

You see its not always about the grand gestures. Its not about how much it cost. Its really showing your partner how much you care about him, how you think about him. Its these small things that are really the big things in relationships.

That was on Friday today he is still walking around on cloud nine. It will remind him of how special you are. He has been that little bit more attentive towards me. Its funny as I have noticed the extra attention. Its nice.

So ladies tomorrow, go out there and do something small for him. Don't do the usual things. In fact do what I done. Get that card and tell him how grateful you are for him. Just watch how much he appreciates it. We shouldn't always expect to get gifts. We can give too.

Hopefully soon, he will be able to show you how grateful, he is to have you too.

Are you a Surviour of an abusive relationship?

2009-08-13T22:56:00.004+01:00

Hi ladies,

I would like your help on this one. I am in the process of writing a book on relationships. I would like to understand women who have been abused physically in their relationships and have come out the other side.

I watched my mother for years put up with a lot of abuse from my father. I would like to explore and find out what got you out of it?

What were your challenges?

Please leave me your name and email address in the box on the right. Once I have received it I will send you a personal message asking you a few questions. It will all be anonymously done. I will not reveal any names. Your names and email addresses will be safe with me.

Thank You.

Lets not abuse him

2009-08-11T20:56:00.003+01:00

Some of us women are terrible. We abuse our men with insulting words, then wonder why they treat us the way they do. How do you feel when someone, anyone says something negative to you? We don't feel very nice do we? Well imagine a loved one telling you that your useless!

I have witnessed so many times when women throw insults at their men. They tell them things which are not encouraging, then expect them to wine and dine them after. No No No women, they wont. We have to nurture our men, we have to show them love attention and affection. If they upset us, lets not insult them. Why would you call him a "complete fool, useless, your not a real man, I can find better than you" You women out there know who I'm talking about. If this fits you, then fix up.

A real man needs to feel like a real man. The reason I'm putting this on you women is because, I have witnessed some decent men get abused by you women. I have witnessed sentences like, "Your so unintelligent, maybe you should go back to school", or " you don't stimulate my mind, your conversations bore me". How the hell is that going to get you a decent man or even keep a decent man?

You see the way I do it, When my husband is upset with me, or I'm upset with him. I let it all out and communicate my issue with him, at the same time pointing out his good points. When I was a teenager, I would insult men and put them down, then I would wonder why they acted so distant towards me!

We all need to be reminded of our good points. If you want someone to notice something negative about themselves, make sure you also point out the good in them too.

Advice from friends.

2009-08-08T23:03:00.003+01:00

When we have problems within our relationships, we tend to go to our friends with the problem and ask for advice. Its great to have friends and go to them for advice but it doesn't mean we must take the advice all the time. Most of the time our friends will have our best interest at heart, the problem is, they are not in your relationship. We can all have a moan about our relationship and if we moan too much, on the outside, it will appear that we have a very unhappy relationship when this may not really be the case.

Behind close doors we all have much different relationships to what our friends may see. The problem is, if you go to your friends with all your relationship problems, then they may judge it wrong. Not meaning to , but they can only go by what you tell them. Most of the time, we can paint a picture worse than what it is because we are angry at the time. No one sees what really goes on behind those closed doors apart from you and your partner.

I know in the past I must have given some really bad advice in my teenage years as I was very anti men. I believed all men were useless and just out for what they could get. Most of my advice was quite negative. It was very hard for me to see the good in men. So in future when you do go to a friend for advice, look at the state of their relationship first, or see what their views on men are first. No one is perfect, there is going to be ups and downs in all relationships. Just because you have had an argument about money or the children, there is no need for you to go running to a friend with all the information. Don't always go moaning to your friend. You may be really happy with your partner, but with all the moaning and complaining to your Friends it does not come across that way, so the advice could be negative, which will not help your relationship indoors.

Moan at him instead, until you feel better about the situation.

Of course as women we will speak about our relationships. what I am saying is don't share your whole relationship with your friends, its none of their business really. If you do tend to share things with your friends, make sure its the good things too. This way you can attract more goodness into your relationship.

The next blog I will write about how we women at times be-little our men with the words we use.

Taking us for granted

2009-08-06T10:55:00.002+01:00

We all tend to take the other for granted at times. Sometimes when we speak about it, we feel as though we are not being heard.

There are some real liberty taking men out there. I have seen them and I have been with them in the past. They expect you to cook everyday, keep a clean home, look after children, wash your clothes theirs and the children. Plus you are still meant to walk around with a smile on your face everyday and not complain about being tired. You also go to work within all that process. For all the things you do, there is no thank you, there is no "oh darling put your feet up, Ill do that today". You know what the worse thing of all this is? We women put up with it then complain to our friends.

Now women, if your man is not disabled, why are you running around like a fool? If you enjoy doing all that, then great but for all you women out there who don't like it and are not sure how to change it, then let me give you a few clues.

Try going away and staying with a family member for a whole night and day. Dont have an argument about it, just do it casually. Let him see how hard you have it. Let him cook his own food and wash up after himself. Do the little subtle things. Dont change the bed for two weeks, see if he notices it. Dont cook for a few days. Tell him your tired. Break the chain, do things out of pattern. Start spending more time with your friends. Do these things slowly bit by bit. Be prepared for an argument or two. You just have to slow down and stop doing so much. If you have never discussed these things with him, then this is not the route for you. This is the route only for those who have not been heard by him. If you have never communicated your feelings about this to him before, then you need to do that first for a while. Dont just jump in there with these tactics.

So what if the house becomes a mess. Yes we know you dont want to live in the mess, guess what? neither does he! You have to slow down so he can see just how much you do. Once he can't take it anymore, then drop it on him. Tell him you need his in put, you want him to do more around the house and stop taking you for granted. This way you can stop taking your own self for granted once he hears what you are saying and he starts to help around the house a bit.

I remember back in the past, to get my point across, I stopped packing and unpacking the dishwasher and stopped changing the bed. My husband is great around the house now. Imagine, we both went to work, done the same hours, but he would expect as I'm the woman to do the cooking. I did it at first then I found myself complaining, so I stopped the cooking. Now my husband cooks most of the time.

Believe me, they will all try it, if you let them. They can only get a way with it, for as long as you allow them. Now when I cook, he enjoys it more.

If we allow them, then they will.

Those Mysterious Phone calls

2009-08-02T20:13:00.003+01:00

These are my solutions to the mysterious calls. Please do Remember they are my solutions. You may not agree with them at all. Tomorrow I will be tackling how to get that subtle revenge on your partner when he takes you for granted too much, or he doesn't show you enough attention.

He gets a lot of mysterious phone calls

Why? Why is your man getting mysterious phone calls? Why have you allowed your relationship to become like this? It is so rude for your man/husband/partner, to have phone calls, which you know nothing about. You don’t even know the person he is talking to. He walks out of the room when the phone rings. You should know who he is talking to. Even if it’s a business call you should know about it.

I’m not saying that you shouldn't talk in private. We all do at times. Sometimes when my phone rings, I walk away from my husband as I’m having a girlie chat with one of my sisters or my friends but he always knows who, I am talking to. He just doesn't have to know what the conversation is about all the time. He does the same to me too. We don’t do it often, but it happens. Any one in a relationship that has a partner who has many secret calls, texts etc, then you really need to question your relationship. Why all the secrecy. The only solution to this is you need to ask yourself, “ Do I really want this?”

No one deserves to be in a relationship where there are many many secrets. You are not a doormat. You need to have more respect for yourself. Its obvious there is something going on. Whatever it is, you don’t know about it. How many secrets can you stand? How many years do you want to wonder what is going on? This is your call. Is this what you want for yourself? Is this all you deserve.

Time to confront him about those calls. Get to the bottom of it. You need to let him know how rude it is, for you to both be in the same environment and he gets calls and you have no idea who and why they are calling. He either needs to stop taking the calls, turn the phone off, or stop being so secretive about it all. He needs to let you into his life a bit more.

When confronting him, again you have to coax him like a baby! Maybe you could approach him like this:

“Darling I'm distressed, I’m starting to feel really useless. I know you don’t mean to do the things that you do, but you are affecting me in a really bad way. I believe in my heart that you love me, but then, sometimes I have to question it. Does he really love me? Should I leave and start my life again?”

At this point he may want to jump in with his own words. Don’t allow him. You need to finish what you are saying first. Ask him nicely to allow you to get these things off your chest.

“Darling you get a lot of phone calls, which you take in secret. I don’t know what you are talking about, or who to, for all I know you could have another lover, or you could be planning a get out clause. It makes me feel like rubbish when you leave me there like nothing, whilst you take your calls in private. I have been putting up with it for a long time. At first it didn’t affect me, but its been going on for so long now and I cant take it anymore. I really feel awful about it. I'm not saying you shouldn't have your calls darling, I'm just saying, I think you need to take my feelings into consideration when making these calls, or taking these calls. I should know some of what is going on in your life”

Wait for his reaction, and then you should know how to take it from there. If you can reach a compromise then at least it’s a start. Ask him to turn his phone off at a certain time. Start there.

We are worth more than a cheat!

2009-07-30T18:38:00.005+01:00

I have received a few comments regarding, women who go back to men who cheat. The comments all make sense. One woman said that she just wasn't ready to leave the man. Now I can understand that. You do need to be ready, both mentally and emotionally but it has to be done. No one really wants to stay with a cheat. It only destroys your inner soul, it makes you feel worthless and your not. No woman is worthless, its how we are made to feel. If we don't know any better then we will just continue to do the things we are used to doing. Habits, that's what they are and that's all they are. Habits can be changed. As with anything in life we have to want to change.

If a man cheats on you the once and you want to give him the benefit of the doubt, I can understand that. Although I'm not too sure how my reaction would be if it happened to me. If you are in a relationship where the man is a continuous cheat then you really need to question your relationship. Why are you still with him? Ask yourself that question and be honest. Is it fear of being alone? Fear of being a single parent? Do you believe that's the best you can do? Do you love him more than you love yourself?

The reason I ask do you love him more than yourself is because many women say they stay because they love him! Yes I can understand love. Is love abusive? no I don't believe it is. It can be but we need to nip it in the bud immediately. No one wants to be in a abusive relationship.

Staying with someone who cheats is a choice its a choice to be abused. That may sound harsh but its the truth. You choose to stay in that relationship, you chose to stay with that partner. The good thing is, you can also choose when to leave. I understand that you need to feel strong within yourself before you can leave. You have to make yourself stronger. No one can do this for you but you. You have to make that decision to move on and move on for good. Find help in other places. Places different from the ones you may have been using in the past. Ie: friends and family. Yes their advice will be good for you as most of them will give you an un bias opinion. Read self help books if you don't already, I believe that's a good place to start. Start somewhere, where you can learn more about who you are. "Act like a woman Think like a man" written by steve Harvey. This is a book which was given as a referral from someone who left a comment. The title says it all!

Stop telling yourself negative things about yourself, its all a lie. The more negative you are about yourself the more you are going to believe it. What do you tell yourself when he cheats? do you say "oh he doesn't love me, I'm not good enough for him, I'm too fat, I'm too ugly" Do you tell yourself things like "I cant raise the children on my own". Think about those things that you say to yourself. The things we tell ourselves, make us behave in that way. If you were to tell yourself, "I'm far too good for this, I'm worth more than this, I know there is better out there for me, a real caring loving man would be happy to have me and my children" If you told yourself the latter, you would act as you think.

We must be careful how we speak to ourselves. We are worth more than a cheat!

Cheats

2009-07-28T22:43:00.003+01:00

This is just something random. I may do this from time to time. I want you guys out there to help me. I really would love to get into the minds of others. I am very interested in knowing the truth to this question.

Why do women take men back who have been unfaithful to them?

Now I'm not knocking anyone. As you know from reading my blog, this is my first long term relationship. I am not experienced in being with men who cheat then having them back. When I was around 19 years old, I got caught up in something like that. That's another story. I didn't like the rejection, so I would have taken him back. For how long I'm not sure, as in my heart I knew, I could not be second best.

So I would love to hear your views on why women take back men who cheat and of course visa versa. Why do men take back cheating women? Like I said I am not being judgmental about it. I would like to understand it more. If someone came to me for advice about it, my ultimate advice would be to leave him! Would I be right in advising someone that way. Who am I to say leave him? Would I?

Let me know.

He Never compliments You!

2009-07-28T03:07:00.002+01:00

I do hope you found my other solution to, he never takes you out, useful. Like I said and I will keep saying these are my solutions. I do believe if you put some of them into action they will work. What have you got to lose? Unless of course you have reached the end of the road and its time for you both to move away from the relationship. If you are not happy and you have been unhappy for a long time. Is it worth it??

My solution to He never compliments you.

Take a look In the mirror, how do you look? What do you see when you look in the mirror? Are you as beautiful as the day he met you, or have you gained a few pounds. When he met you, did you wear make up, did you go to the hair dressers on a regular basis. When he met you did you find time to do your nails? You would be surprised at the things which we take for granted. The things we think he would be OK with but he is not.

My husband doesn’t allow me to get away with a thing. If my nails need to be redone, he will say, “darling you need to go and do your nails” He says the same about my hair. Even if he sees that I'm putting on a bit of weight, he will mention it. I don’t take it as an insult. He has taken the time to notice that there is something, about me that needs fixing! I'm very lucky to have a husband who takes notice of every part of me.

Don’t get me wrong, we all have our off days and cant be bothered to go over the top with ourselves everyday. Some of you it’s the norm. You don’t take care of yourselves anymore. You let yourselves go. Then you wonder why he has roaming eyes, when you are out in public together!

You don’t look as beautiful, as you did when he first met you. Maybe he used to tell you that you needed to do things to yourself to better your appearance. Instead of taking heed, you took it as an insult and gave him what for. You see, if our men are being honest with us, yes it can hurt, but it can also help. He says to you, “Darling your getting a bit fat” You say. “ what how can you tell me that, that’s not a very nice thing to say to me. Now you have given me a complex, that’s not the sort of thing you tell your woman”. How can he be honest with you if your going to scream at him for being honest? Why not look at yourself and say, you know what, he may be right, my clothes are a bit on the tight side. Just loose a few pounds. I'm not saying, turn into a robot for him. If he is being nasty to you that’s a completely different issue altogether. How often do you compliment him. Do you take notice when he goes to the barbers for example. Do you compliment him when he buys a new outfit and puts it on, or do you just look and lift your eyebrows. Complimenting is all part of a healthy relationship. There are some things which we can not just take for granted. We cant just think, Oh I don’t need to compliment him, he knows he looks nice.

Maybe he has let himself go, therefore you don’t compliment him because you cant. The same rules apply tell him neatly, to fix up!

He Never Takes You Out.

2009-07-25T14:44:00.002+01:00

As I said I would give you a few solutions to these bad relationships. Remember they are only my solutions. You may agree or not. I would love to hear your comments.

Solution to He never takes you out: Remember its my solutions.

He never takes you out,

Why do you think he never takes you out? First look at how long you have been in the relationship. Go back to the first times. Ask yourself, did he ever take you out on dates. If your answer to that question is no, then you now know why, he never takes you out on dates. You change this. Firstly, communicate with him. Talk to him and ask him why he never takes you out. Don’t turn it into an argument, as this is just the first stage of you getting what you want.

Don’t bring it up when he is in a bad mood. Wait until the children are in bed, or your both relaxing. Then ask the question in the nicest possible way you know how. You could ask him like this:

“Babe, can I ask you something? I don’t want you to get upset with me, or think that I’m fishing for an argument, as i'm not but why don’t you ever take me out?

Wait for his answer. Nine times out of ten the response will be something like,

“Oh I don’t now”

“What’s brought this on “?

“Who you been talking to”

“Where do you want to go”?

“You know we haven’t go any money”

“Oh here we go”

Once he has answered your question. Leave it there. Now its up to you to take the initiative and get what you want. Life isn’t about sitting down looking pretty, and expecting things to go our way, without any action from ourselves. You want your partner to take you out, and then you are going to have to get him to take you out. No more bitching and moaning get on with it. What’s the old saying, “Do unto others as you would want done unto you” Something like that. You get the gist of it. You need to take him out. You need to take action and plan that night or day out. The ball is in your court. Just because you are a woman, it doesn’t mean you cant wine and dine your man.

You plan that night out. Get the baby sitters if necessary. Book a table somewhere. Make sure its somewhere romantic. Don’t take him somewhere you wouldn’t want him to take you. Prepare this date with your man. Plan it properly. You don’t need to surprise him. Tell him “Darling i'm taking you out”. Tell him what time he needs to be ready, tell him to look sexy, as you are going to treat him.

This is where you are going to have to change the tables. You may even have to tell him a few little white lies, but these white lies, make them feel like men. Then you can get almost anything you want. Here it goes, little while lie number one. “Darling you make me so happy, I know we have had our ups and downs, but I love you and I want us to do special things together. You’re a good man darling and I don’t want to loose you”. This will make him feel like his the best thing since slice bread! Get ready go out for the meal. Use this time to sit and talk about your feelings. Talk about how you first met. Only talk about positive things. This meal, knows no negativity.

Once you have taken him on that date, take him on another, then another. Then you tell him, that is how you would love for him to treat you. Ask him after you have taken him out at least three times, when he is planning on taking you out?

Bad Relationships

2009-07-23T16:00:00.002+01:00

There are many signs within our relationship which tells us whether or not we are in a Good or bad relationship. We tend to ignore many of these signs. I have my own view on what these signs look like. I will give you a version of my list and then in the week I will give you a version of my opinions on how to change them if possible! I wont give a solution to all of them, just some.

Please remember, that some people cant be and don't want to change. Maybe you may need to think about changing your surroundings, including the man or the woman!

1. He never takes you out

2. He always hangs out with his friends

3. He gets a lot of mysterious phone calls

4. He never buys you gifts

5. He never compliments you

6. He doesn’t help out with the children

7. He doesn’t tell you how much he loves you

8. You don’t know how much he gets paid

9. You don’t know what he does with his wages each month

10. He doesn’t work and hasn’t for a long time

11. He is not in your bed every night

12. He hasn’t taken you to meet his family

13. You barley make love with each other

14. He expects you to cook for him every night, he has never made you a meal once

15. You don’t do anything in your relationship other than watch TV together sometimes

16. He never encourages you to achieve anything

17. He is always putting you down

18. He doesn’t like any of your friends

19. He never listens to you

20. You argue with each other every day.

21. He doesn’t fancy me, or find me attractive anymore.

22. You no longer make love together, or very far and few.

Remember I will give you my solutions, on how to over come some of them.

Introduction

2009-07-17T16:23:00.003+01:00

For all those who were following my blog before, I must apologise for the loss of its contents. I have started a completely new one now. I do hope it did not cause too many disruptions for you.

I will be using this blog to help all of those who wish to have some help in their relationship. I am qualified in life experiences. I have watched and learned for many years. I have seen what I don't want for myself, what I would not put up with and what I believe you should not put up with. Everything I speak about will be my own beliefs and my own opinions. Some of it you will agree with and some you wont. If I were you I would take from all of this what you like. Take from it, what you think will work for you.

We all make very silly mistakes in life. Some of us make mistakes of staying with people we no longer love. We stay in that particular relationship out of habit, or because of the children, maybe its because you have been together for many years and you don't want to think of those past years as a waste of time. I will be covering so many things to do with relationships.

You may ask yourself, who is she what does she know? Well I can tell you I have had to kiss many frogs to find my prince. Many Friends and family members would be in long term relationships and I would be the odd one out. My relationships would not pass the 18months mark. I just wouldn't stand for any nonsense. I would look around at people in their relationships and think, there is no way I would stay in that! Some would fight with their men, some men would be unfaithful and the women too. They would all put up with it. Now to me that's wasting your life. Why stay in rubbish, why stay in something you are not happy with? There is a Mr or Mrs right out there for all of you. I should know I found mine in the end.

My husband and I have been together for 5 years now. Like I said this is the longest relationship I have ever had. Whilst doing my blog, I will refer a lot to my relationship with my husband. I would say my relationship is near perfect. Not quite perfect. Like all relationships regardless of how great it is, we do have our ups and downs too.

Tomorrow, I will start off by giving you a list of the signs which I think make a bad relationship.

I am always open for comments and questions.